Parenting Toward Solutions: How Parents Can Use Skills They Already Have to Raise Responsible, Loving Kids

Based on Solution-Focused Brief Therapy, a counseling model that focuses on times when a specific problem does not occur instead of why it happens, this remarkable new resource helps parents learn how to change their relationships with their children, so children may be empowered to solve their own problems.

Publishers Weekly

In this guide to working through some of the common problems that crop up in raising a family, Metcalf, an experienced family therapist, suggests that understanding the reasons for a behavior doesn't always change it. Focusing on solutions, she offers parents ways of changing their children's destructive behaviors by using the skills they have already learned, especially from the workplace. While children, of course, aren't expected to behave like corporate employees, Metcalf makes her points forcefully, putting forth extremely specific strategies and goals, illustrated with sample dialogues and case studies. Readers who aren't put off by the author's stilted prose and somewhat monotonously earnest tone will likely find useful observations and approaches here. Metcalf shows readers how to keep the child's problem from overshadowing the whole child and how to define it as something that can be solved. She offers techniques for improving communication with teenagers and helping younger children overcome specific anxieties. Strategies for handling more serious challenges, such as attention deficit disorder, depression and anger, are also provided, along with information on dealing with school conflicts from kindergarten on. Tips on talking to kids about grief and loss, sex and drugs are also provided; exercises and worksheets are included throughout the volume. (Feb.)